Why Premarital Counseling is Essential on Your Wedding Checklist
When you hear premarital counseling, you may have different ideas that come to mind. If you’re into counseling, you may be thinking “could be helpful, but I don’t think that’s something we need” or “sounds interesting, but where are we going to find the time?!”. If you’re someone who isn’t interested in counseling or has never been in it before, you may even think the idea of premarital counseling sounds a little crazy! After all, if you need counseling before the wedding, couldn’t that be a warning sign?
Did you know that premarital counseling has been shown to lower divorce rates by up to 30%? And, couples who seek premarital counseling are more likely to seek therapy in the future as bumps in the relationship inevitably pop up. So, research shows us the opposite to be true! Not only is attending premarital counseling not a warning sign, it could be something that has a positive impact on your future marriage!
Premarital counseling is great because it often takes a proactive approach instead of a reactive approach to relationship issues. While couples may come into premarital counseling with a few things on their checklist that they find themselves bumping into, typically, this type of counseling is much more about preparing for future issues that may arise or, working through current issues before they become bigger and bigger as time goes on.
In fact, premarital counseling can even be a little fun! I love to incorporate as much joy, gratitude and moments of connection into the premarital work I do with clients, because my hope is that it is an experience that feels enriching and encouraging for each person individually and for the relationship as a whole.
Premarital counseling can also be a great place to really build a foundation and relationship with your therapist, so that it feels easy to ease back into counseling if needed. Imagine being in your first year of marriage and being surprised by how difficult its been to communicate or struggling with something like finances or intimacy. Maybe, you experience a big life shift such as a death or a job change. For many couples, this can feel lonely and challenging to navigate and process. But, for couples who have that foundation of premarital counseling with a trusted individual, there may be a place to go when these things arise. They have someone to normalize the challenges that can show up early in marriage, and that can walk with them either together, or through resources individually, to provide care and normalize these big life challenges that couples often face.
For all these reasons (and more!) premarital counseling can be a great thing to add to your pre-wedding checklist. For many couples, it has lasting benefits that extend beyond the day of the wedding, and can help to set a strong foundation for arguably the most important commitment you’ll make! It gives tools and normalizes challenges. It is (hopefully!) a time to connect with and experience joy with your partner as you learn more about them. It is worth the investment!
If you’re interested in premarital counseling, I’d love for you to reach out and schedule a free, 15-minute consultation!